Wednesday, September 3, 2014

REVIEW: Somebody Up There Hates You by Hollis Seamon

Somebody Up There Hates YouChemo, radiation, a zillion surgeries, watching my mom age twenty years in twenty months: if that’s part of the Big Dude’s plan, then it’s pretty obvious, isn’t it? Somebody Up There Hates You.

SUTHY has landed me here in this hospice, where we—that’s me and Sylvie—are the only people under 30 in the whole place, sweartogod. But I’m not dead yet. I still need to keep things interesting. Sylvie, too. I mean, we’re kids, hospice-hostages or not. We freak out visitors; I get my uncle to sneak me out for one insane Halloween night. Stuff like that. And Sylvie wants to make things even more interesting. That girl’s got big plans.

Only Sylvie’s father is so nuclear-blasted by what’s happened to his little girl, he glows orange, I swear. That’s one scary man, and he’s not real fond of me. So we got a major family feud going on, right here in hospice. DO NOT CROSS line running down the middle of the hall, me on one side, her on the other. It’s crazy.

In the middle of all of this, really, there’s just me and Sylvie, a guy and a girl. And we want to live, in our way, by our own rules, in whatever time we’ve got. We will pack in some living before we go, trust me.

Somebody up there must hate me because they let me read this book.
I hate writing negative reviews for a book. I hate coming across books that I just don't like, but I did not like this book AT ALL.

The entire plot of this book is basically a horny teenage guy, who happens to have cancer, trying to get into the pants of the only girl his age in the hospital. That's it. There is nothing more to this book besides that.

When I read a book, I like to read a book with an actual plot, not a book about a horny teenage. Yes, he's a teenage guy, a lot of teenage guys are like that! But can't we have an actual plot? Or even something else happening besides two teenagers' quest to lose their virginity? (Yes, the girl actually encourages this!).

Another thing I would like to mention is the "conflict". One main conflict is Sylvie’s, the girl, dad. Her dad does not like our main character, not a bit, and our main character is constantly complaining about him and fighting with him. Richie, our main character, also doesn't seem to understand why Sylvie's dad doesn't like him and is endlessly frustrated that her dad keeps preventing Richie from sleeping with Sylvie. Hmmmmmmm...why in the world would her dad not like Richie?
Maybe it's because Richie keeps trying to have sex with Sylvie!
I think that would piss any father off!!!

Okay, I'm definitely not a fa of this book. I really wish I gave up on it (I NEVER give up on books!) and I was tempted to, but it was so short that I decided to go through with it.
I do not recommend this book and I apologize for the rant.

I hereby give this book
1 Wheel
Meaning: I did not like it

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